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Are You Watching?

 

It is glitzy.

It is glamorous.

It is garish.

It is too long.

It is narcissistic.

It is self- congratulatory.

It is way, way, way too long.

And it is boring.

If you haven’t figured it out yet, I am talking about the Academy Awards; that perennial bloated TV extravaganza where the preening star’s arms are not long enough to pat themselves on the back.

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This Sunday, February 22nd is the 2015 Oscar telecast.

I for one will not be watching. I have not watched it in over a dozen years. Ever since that class act, Johnny Carson stopped hosting, the show has sunk into mediocrity.

And did I tell you the the show is freaking way too long? The show needs a good editor. The show should be no longer than 2 hours; 3 at most. That would mean basically just handing out the statue with no musical acts and no more documentaries and no more banter and quips by the presenters. They may be great actors, but they are terrible at banter.

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Furthermore, it is always amazing to me that the men and woman who have written masterful movie scripts like The Kings Speech, The Shawshank Redemption, The Godfather, Schinlinder’s List, Gone With the Wind, Some Like It Hot, To Kill a Mockingbird, and Rear Window can’t write a coherent, intelligent script for the Oscar’s and instead produce such a stale, boring, tedious, dull, and monotonous TV show.

So no Oscars for me again this year!

Instead, I will be watching the far more exciting Local Weather Channel.

Are you going to watch the Oscars?

Why or why not?

Featured Recipe     Bacon Bourbon Caramel Pop Corn

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You can’t go to a movie without getting popcorn. Right?

Sometimes the pop corn is the best part of the movie.

So what is the perfect snack for watching the Oscars?

Pop Corn of course!!!!!

However……….

…………….you won’t get this pop corn at any movie theater I know.

This recipe helps make up for the boredom of the Oscars. And if that doesn’t work, just drink the left over bourbon.   E ROFLAO

Recipe can be doubled, even tripled..

This is what you will need for about 2 quarts pop corn:

About 6 cups of popped corn *

6 or 7 slices bacon

½ cup dark brown sugar

¼ cup dark corn syrup **

4 tablespoons butter

Pinch or two or three of sea salt

¼ teaspoon vanilla

1-2 tablespoon bourbon ***

¼ cup baking soda

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* It does not matter how you pop the corn. Do it the old fashioned way or use micro wave pop corn. It is your pop corn and your time. Do what you want. However, if using micro wave pop corn be sure to use plain pop corn, no butter or other ingredients on the corn.

** If you can afford the expense use real maple syrup for an even more decadent treat.

*** Optional

Here is what you do:

Pop the corn.

Fry or nuke the bacon till crisp. Drain on paper towels. Cool and break up into pieces.

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Place the popcorn and crumbled bacon in a large roasting pan. You may need more than one pan. Gently mix and place in a 250 degree oven, or on the ‘Warm and Hold’ function.

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Put the butter, brown sugar and corn syrup in a heavy saucepan.

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Constantly stir the mixture over medium heat and bring to a boil. (Bubbles are forming around the edges of the pan.)

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Without mixing allow the mixture to boil for 5 minutes.

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Then remove the mixture from the heat and stir in the sea salt, vanilla, bourbon, and baking soda.

The baking soda will cause the mixture to fizz.

NOTE: If you want a sweeter caramel use more vanilla. If you want a more adult popcorn add more bourbon.

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Using a big spoon drizzle the mixture over the pop corn. Use a spatula or spoon and gently toss to mix and coat the pop corn.

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Bake in 250 degree oven for 1 hour stirring and breaking up the popcorn every 15 or 20 minutes with a spoon or spatula.

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Cool and break apart any clumps of pop corn.

Serve. Eat. Enjoy.

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IF there are any leftovers, and I doubt there will be, store in a tightly covered container.

Bon Appétite
Cost

6 cups of popped corn         $1.72

6 or 7 slices bacon              $2.55

½ cup dark brown sugar      $0.31

¼ cup dark corn syrup         $0.16

4 tablespoons butter            $0.60

Pinch of sea salt                  $0.33

¼ teaspoon vanilla              $0.18

1-2 tablespoon bourbon        $1.30

¼ cup baking soda              $0.12

Total Cost = $7.27
Cost per cup of popcorn = $1.45

Quote of the Day

Warren Beatty

We want to thank all of you for watching us congratulate ourselves tonight.

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8 comments to Are You Watching?

  • Leslie

    I do NOT watch the Oscars. It reminds me of a bad variety show and actors are overrated anyway.

  • That popcorn looks amazing! And no I don’t watch. The Oscars are a borefest. The only thing I find interesting is the worst dressed list post Oscars.

  • I have never watched, I am not a celebrity watcher. In any case, we have cancelled our satellite tv service and now have just one local channel and a huge range of choices on Netflix.

    Popcorn looks delicious.

  • Cindy

    You go Rah! Great take-down of the Oscars. I will not be watching..but I will be watching Downton Abbey ;-). Very unique popcorn recipe!

  • I didn’t watch it either. It’s just a trade show for actors where they pat each other on the back and try to outdress one another. That popcorn with bacony goodness on the top would certainly make me sit up and take notice though!